Woe is me!

I am a few days behind in this postdaily2011 *sad face*

Anyways to hop back on board, I came to a realization today. When someone cherish the life you live. I thought about driving.

I get anxious at times about drivingthe 20 or so miles to my work in Sacramento. I have to think about the not-so-aware drivers, the truckers, the people who don’t signal… all that junk. I realized I worry more about other people’s driving than my own! and as a response I drive defensively. The thing I noticed with other people is that they just DRIVE. Drive as though the only objective is to get to point a to point b. But unfortunately they are missing all the small things.

When you drive you double check everything before you start right? Lights on, engine on, no weird noises, if it’s foggy put on the headlights, mirrors at the right angles…

But have you ever thought you should get better at driving while youre driving? To me driving everyday is a test. My way of getting expert at my daily routine, perhaps taking a different once in awhile to see if I can pass that test. There are varying x factors that affect the drive. This is probably why people get road rage.

Not to point anyone out but bad habits in driving are not very wise. For example, relying on cruise control, texting/calling, eating, anything distracting is setting yourself up for failure. And just because nothing bad has happened yet, it could and perhaps it will. Brushing off close calls is ignoring a lack of competency and maybe judgment.

If you could do these things and work on your driving techniques then hallelujah.

Somehow I lose the punch in my posts, but I will come back and edit this later.

What’s the most important thing you’re putting off? And why haven’t you done it yet? What do you need to make it happen?

Thank you for asking.

The most important thing I am putting off has been keeping in touch with my family and friends. Making time for a quick phone call has incited a feeling of anxiousness and dread, but not because I have to dial the phone and make conversation.Maybe it’s because I just hear problems and issues requiring a solution.

Since I am situated in Sacramento, my intention was to call my parents at least twice a week. We’ve been going through a tough transition for our family and my absence has been a drag. Maybe I don’t want to deal with it but it’s not healthy to keep away from people that need you, and your strength.

Being gone from home, it hurts. But I’m doing what I want to do for myself, and when I am in the circumstance to return then I will. I miss the summer breezes, and being sun kissed in San Diego. Such lovely weather compared to this extreme of Sacramento & Central Valley climate. *sigh*

What I am doing to make it happen is giving my parents the random phone calls and texts that I enjoy 🙂

Day #11 – Chaos Theory

An ounce of madness is needed to create art. Chaos is what creates the artist.

It’s been some time since my last affair to do with anything creative or artistic. My mind is in sinking into a depression!

To cheer me up I read up on my favorite artist, Marcus Rothkowitz. Excuse my lack of art history jargon since it has been years and months in the counting since I’ve even taken an art class or art history class. Does not mean that I love it less.

Mark Rothko ( Marcus Rothkowitz) – Abstract Expressionist

What do I love about Rothko besides COLOR? Many people would argue that his paintings are simple, that anyone can paint on a large canvas, the size compensating for substance. But see, what is missing from that? Just because someone CAN paint, does that mean he should do it? Yes, having taken that step into modern painting and discovering so much personal meaning from the act of painting is more substance than what is criticized about the painting. Taking from a few sources, Rothko had written in an unfinished manuscript,

“the fact that one usually begins with drawing is already academic. We start with color.”

It is profound. That is why I love his work. Such vibrancy, lines, and strokes is soothing to the mind. What I see is truth in his paintings. Rudimentary, basic, primitive you might say. If emotions can be defined through color, you’d see yourself swamped by the colors painted upon the canvas … you are no longer observing , you are in it …

Back to remembering the time periods defined by artistic contribution, while I ponder upon, who are the people that will define this generation?

Day # 10: todays poets and lyricists

expression. To display or show feeling.

do you like hip hop? Country? Pop? Grunge? Rock? Can you explain why?

There are plenty of songs that come out that I cringe at and most of the time songs are catchy. Then there are verses and lines that just pop out and deserve recognition.

For example, I know many people who love mainstream music because that’s what’s available to them. But unfortunately they don’t listen to the lyrics.

Then there’s the people who do.

Day #7: What are you looking forward to this year?

Overall, Just like Obama is still preaching … is looking for a change. There are some things in life that require us to move forward and progress even if we like being comfortable but you never go anywhere if you stay in your comfortable spot.

My first year has gone from graduating college and I’m ready to take on everything. So far, I am looking forward to establishing a consistent routine for learning Mandarin and Cantonese at the same time, dedicated to getting healthy and in shape again, and just growing.

The best part of that is you never notice when it’s happening and taking from Nicki Minaj’s verse in ‘2012″ w/ Jay Sean

Simile’s, metaphors and we pop pills
sick flow inundated with the doc bills
work hard, now we know how to top bills
in the middle of the street doing cartwheels
lot of them tryna do it but its not real
wasn’t a rapper then I coulda got a pop deal
white clothes in a hot pink hot wheels
lot of bottles and a lot of booty cocktails
uh, days of our lives
you wink it goes by
so we’ll just get it with no edison
anything goes so no time for closed minds
and free my lil weezy
and lets just get right
Young Money, Cash Money in the building
lets go the World ends tonight

Day #6: What made you decide to start a blog? If you’ve blogged about this before, go back and read it. Is that still the reason? What’s changed?

Since the age of 13, I went through a multitude of blogs.

My first one was located on Scribble.nu. I can’t really remember anymore what I thought was relevant to write but it was a transition from bound journals and my exploration into the online web. It was nice because they were basically “scribbles” of whatever I did that day, what I thought, my insight … all that junk.

Let’s see where else I ventured to …

Blogger.com was the longest website I posted on and it was an off and on relationship.

Then someone invited me to have one of their journals on livejournal.com, which I am grateful for and still hold fond memories of. I can say I learned a lot not just from the communities but from the person who asked me to go on there.

Next was xanga.com, which was long running too. I can’t even remember the name because I deleted it as well. I shake my head at that because I had a lot of well-written poems on there.

My best friend and I then discovered blogdrive.com and began personal journals there, and we shared each other’s posts to one another. Then it drifted away, but our friendship didn’t of course LOL. She kept her blogdrive for her trips to europe and I kept one for whatever reasons.

I then forayed with tumblr. I didn’t like the dashboard and the way to post.

I then found wordpress where I wanted to focus on my personal development within a blog. I guess it was more of a graduation into a more sophisticated arena.

For me, the reason I begin a blog is to be able to document the things going on around me. But then I wanted something where I can document myself, how I grow, and just see. Before I blogged just because it felt nice to have my thoughts before me and a place to keep them centered. Now I keep one to inspire, invoke, inundate…

One person said to me that to keep introspection is to continually see the world around you change in relation to you. So I must, to continue.